Recently a lot of my friends got married. I was closely involved with the wedding proceedings of couple of them. In the process I found out that wedding time is a time of clashes. Elders think that bride and bridegroom dont listen to them and dont have enough respect for the rituals that go on at the wedding. Kids think that the rituals are ridiculous especially in this age. It got me thinking whose mistake is it that there exists this kind of difference? Do kids really condescend the rituals? So I asked them why, if they , condescend the rituals. Primary reason I got is, it is old style, its baseless and mostly why are they even there? What is their significance? So I went and asked elders what their significance is, and interestingly they dont know the answer. They did it in their marriage and so they want their kids to do it in their marriage. Why, dont ask, we cant answer such questions. You folks dont have respect for our culture. Wow! I thought. Just because you cant answer our questions, you lead to the conclusion that we dont have respect for culture. phew!
I strongly believe that the rituals exist for a reason. No civilization creates something unless they believe there is a reason. The reason may be absurd, but there would be a reason. It may not be a rational one but still there should be a reason. Unfortunately our curiosity to question and find out the reason has diminished and so did the duty of passing those details down to your next generation. If only our parents have found out why they are doing the rituals and answered our questions, may be the difference in the opinion on the rituals wont have been there. I ventured into and found out few of them and believe it or not, they make sense (at least when you put them in to the time line they were created). One can do a full phd on the rituals that happen just in a marriage.
How many of you know why there are games after the wedding in which both the bride and the bridegroom have to participate? How many of you know why apply turmeric and sandalwood to everyone who attends a hindu wedding? Why do they tie three knots? What do those vows mean? Not many people know the meaning. There are several of such small rituals that crept into our culture for a reason. If anyone is interested in either questioning or answering the questions posed, please do so. I would love to continue this discussion over to other topics too.
On a side note, ever heard of the saying, never clean your ears at night? Why do you think it exists?
2 comments:
one thing i need to tell you ra, that is, our days define our lives,every thing depends upon how best u can mould ur day.
anyhow i have just expressed my thoughts
regards
zak
I think I can answer for some of the querries.
1. In oldendays the bride and bridegrooms were seen only after marriage. To avoid the shyness and to make them close there were small games during the marriages.these games used bring them near and can talk each other.
These games also give a way to find out who among them dominated personality.
2. The three knots are sakhsi-
they called trikaran sudhi ga" Manasa, Vacha and Karmana" these are the three knots with them bridegroom tie the wedding knot saying that I shall be with you following threekarana suddiga.
That is why there are three Knots.
3. reagarding application of the turmaric- This is good germ killer. They apply because all the relatives comes from various place with them they also bring some of the dust and other things. So they apply turmeric and also Sandal which gives a aromic and give pleasent amosphere.
that is the reason they apply the Turmeric powder/paste.
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